Jane walks into a gift shop, picks up a candle, asks how much it costs, buys it, and walks back out onto the street. Ted walks into an art gallery, stares at a painting, asks how much it costs, buys it, and walks back out onto the street. Betsy walks into a bookshop, picks up a book, asks how much it costs, buys it, and walks back out onto the street. Now repeat four more times, and then have your seven characters repeat the entire cycle about three more times, and you have a good sense of what it’s like to see It Chapter Two.
It Chapter Two reintroduces us to the seven characters we met in the 2017 reboot of the Stephen King classic It, but we find them now as adults who have largely left the terrifying clown Pennywise in the rearview mirror. When the only one of them who has stuck around in Derry, Maine throughout his life 
realizes that the chilling clown of their childhoods may have returned 27 years later to torture the town’s children yet again, he calls up the six others and begs them to come home: they have a job to finish. The group reluctantly agrees, and each comes back to Derry to face their fears—and Pennywise—together.
I’ll happily admit that I was quite pleased with the 2017 It reboot. It struck the right balance of scares, nostalgia, 80s culture throwbacks, and feel-good fun. I also loved how the story focused entirely on the kids, and how that allowed you to sink into the film’s somewhat cheesy messaging. It felt like a fable you’d hear around the campfire. It was a solid summer horror release and impressive for a reboot, so I was optimistic about the second 
film, especially with stars like Jessica Chastain, Bill Hader, and James McAvoy in the cast. I was also curious to see where the story would go now that the focus was shifting to the adults, and I eagerly expected a much darker, scarier film as a result. But perhaps I should have listened to none other than Sylvia Plath, who famously wrote, “If you expect nothing from somebody you are never disappointed.”
Where do I begin? Well first, It Chapter Two doesn’t just focus 
on the adults, but mixes in far too many flashbacks, practically replaying the first film. This not only disrupts the story’s pacing, but it also makes whole chunks of it quite boring to sit through for those of us faithful horroristas who have seen the first reboot.
Second, and perhaps most notably, it runs far too long, meandering through scenes for a good half of the film that should have been left on the cutting room floor. It Chapter Two marches us through each character’s personal challenges and moments of facing their childhood fears—again—with a repetitive rhythm the audience can practically tap their feet along to, leaving us checking our watches after scene three.
Third, the scares simply don’t deliver. At first, there are a few disturbingly creepy scenes and effective jump scares of note, but by jump number four of twenty-seven, you have a pretty good sense of what to expect. Plus, the CGI on the monsters, ghosts, and ghouls is far too over-the-top and almost comical at times. There are a few especially gruesome scenes involving the clown’s hunger for little kids that are pretty novel, but you have to wade through a whole lot of weak and tacky scares to get to those—here’s hoping you’re still awake and paying attention when the occasional good scare surfaces.
In truth, the most horrifying scene is probably the one conjured in your mind when you realize how many times the tired message of “facing your fears” is slammed into your head like a sledgehammer throughout the film, lasting through the eight different climaxes of the group’s battle with Pennywise, and into the credits—now that’s a real bloodbath. If this were a film straight out of the 80s, or if it had conjured 80s nostalgia as successfully as the 2017 reboot, maybe it would have had a chance, but watching an Oscar-nominated actor spout some of the writing in this film is simply not a pleasant experience.
SpecialK Verdict: Let’s just say that the only thing to be celebrated about It Chapter Two is the film’s tagline: “It ends.”
It Chapter Two opened everywhere September 6.
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