The Change-Up [Review by Parsi]

The Change-Up is the worst kind of movie.  Sophomoric.  Crass.  Plodding.  But, worst of all, just not very funny.

We have seen the schtick a million times before.  Two people switch places because of some cosmic force of justice (here, Lady Justice herself as a fountain) and we laugh at the hilarity of two dissimilar people taking on their new body and life.  Of course, these films always result in each person realizing that they need to make some changes in their own life and to appreciate the other person. 

When pressed by the Daily Show’s Jon Stewart about how this film was different from the other chang-up movies.  Bateman revealed, this one is “Rate-R”.  Seriously, that is all this film brings to the table.  It is an “R-Rated” version of all of the other films you have seen, but way less funny and far less interesting. 

 Jason Bateman plays Dave Lockwood a sad sack married lawyer.  He is wedded to his job and incapable of expressing anything resembling affection for his family (or for that matter the ability to act). 

Ryan Reynolds play Mitch Planko, a trust fund baby misogynist, who dabbles in acting (I wish Reynolds had dabbled in some in this film).  He is pretty much what any hormone driven 14-year-old American boy dreams his life will be like. 

Neither Reynolds or Bateman are at all compelling.  Cardboard cutouts of the two would have better acting chops than these two.  Surprisingly, if I had to pick one who did a better job it would be Reynolds, think about that for a minute (yes it is that bad). 

Speaking of horn-ball 14-year-old boys, this movie is clearly targeting them (which is why Haus has some affection for this movie).  The promise of this movie is to be titillated by the hedonistic stylings of Planko.  But, like its predecessors in the teen age hormone race to the bottom, it isn’t even good at this.  Instead, you get a series of gross out sex scenes.  Like a game of gotcha to let the 14-year-old know he will not be provided with the outlet he is searching for (are they aware of the Internet).  I guess if you are into aggressive pregnant sex scenes or butchered plastic surgery you will have a field day. 

But, it is not enough to steep the film in traditional misogynistic drippings of fetishized women.  No, of course not, the film takes it a step further with your basic run-of-the-mill poop jokes.  Oh, and to add flavor, they decide to pepper the film with the occasional racist comment.  You can’t even call them jokes, because jokes are supposed to be funny. 

Now, don’t get me wrong, I enjoy dark and crass humor.  But, this is not humor.  It is tired and not funny.  Yes, I chuckled occasionally.  But, mostly I looked forward to the release of my up coming root canal.

On top of all of this, the film moves at a snail’s pace.  The jokes are so spread out that you forget this is a comedy.  The story line is even less compelling than the humor.  You know what is going to happen in the first three minutes of the film.  No, not just that they are going to switch bodies, but the lesson they are going to learn too and all of the jokes.  This is one of the most predictable films I have ever seen.  I could have watched the first few minutes and replicated the screenplay verbatim with little effort (and I have never written a screenplay).  You probably could do the same by watching the preview.       

The film has absolutely nothing to offer.  Avoid this film like the plague.  If you want a change-up movie, check out just about any other one available and then imagine some nudity, racism, and poop jokes.  That is pretty much it.  Frankly, you will enjoy it far more than The Change-Up.

PARSI VEDICT:  There is no change, this is exactly the same thing you have seen before, but worse. 

 See what the other half thinks:  Haus’s view.